How to understand this blog

Monday, June 21, 2010

my father and his brush with the law

My dad is a decent law-abiding citizen who loves his grandchildren. In fact, he spends a sizable portion of his time thinking of fun, creative things to send to the grandkids that live in other cities/countries. He writes little books with cartoon illustrations which are seriously funny; sends them clippings from papers that he thinks they will like; they send him things in return. One of my nephews recently sent him a drawing of himself fighting 'the bad guys' with his friends from school. "Is that all you got?" the speech bubbles read. "Bring it on!"

My oldest niece recently turned thirteen, and in preparation for this, Dad decided to do something clever and suspenseful that she would enjoy. He cut out four letters of the alphabet - T E E N - and packaged each letter into a different envelope, sending them out at different dates so they would arrive progressively leading up to her special day. He typed out her name and address and stuck it onto the front - let's call her Miss Namey Name Nameson, 111 Name Street, Name City - and left no clue of the sender on the back, only writing 'Mr T', 'Mr E', 'Mr E' and 'Mr N' so he can tell which envelope has the next letter in it. "Ha ha ha!" he chortled, showing them to me before he sent them.

Name City, a few days later. My sister - let's call her Worried Mum - is shown what she had received in the mail by a confused Namey. Worried Mum's eyes widen. "Namey, you show me if you get something like that again!"

Another letter comes. And another. Worried Mum spends half an hour pulling apart the paper to see if she can find any clues as to who it is. Then she calls New Zealand Post. "Is there any way we can find out where it comes from by the postmark?"

Finally, Worried Mum, so worried by the creepy man who knows her daughter's full name and address and is sending her enigmatic messages, calls the police. It concerns them, so much so that they come round and Namey has to give a statement. "Can you think of anyone who might be stalking you?"

The last letter arrives. Worried Mum catches sight of one word written on the back of the envelope - that's Dad's writing!

All is cleared up, with much hilarity among the family. The final touch remains: Namey gets a call from Victim Support, to whom she has to explain that it was her grandfather all along.

1 comment:

Stacy said...

That is hysterical!