it's mother's day

So it's Mother's Day. Hooray, another totally consumerised excuse for businesses to make money, I tell myself. I always got my mother something little for Mother's Day, but she got embarrassed if I got something that cost too much because she too thought the day was completely unnecessary.

It's ironic, now, in a way, because she's not here, and despite the fact that I don't believe in Mother's Day, I wish she was here and I wish that I could give her some extravagant bunch of flowers which she didn't think she needed but which she so fully deserved. Despite the fact that I don't believe in making "annual days" especially sad, like her birthday or the day of her death, I don't enjoy Mother's Day now, and I was glad that I stayed home from church today with a horrible cold, sniffling into a tissue and drinking echinacea tea, because I didn't have to sit through the inevitable tributes to mothers and encouragements to appreciate our mothers.

I miss Mum a lot, and in a way I miss her more every year. I don't think about her quite as relentlessly as I did during the first year or so, but now, four-and-a-bit years on, I think I have a deeper understanding of what life is going to be like without her.

And so, despite my cynicism, I'm a tolerant Mother's Day sceptic. If it helps people tell their mothers that they are appreciated and loved, well, that's no horrible thing. And from the other point of view, if it gives mums everywhere a break from a REALLY HARD JOB, hooray!